Self-doubt, a slave to greatness.

I have been a slave of fear for so long, and I am sure you might have been hostages of it! Why is it that we often doubt our abilities to achieve? Where does self-doubt emerge from? Often, self-doubt comes from a lack of belief in yourself including your abilities. Due to such a mindset, most people (including myself) become obstacles to their success. Many times, I have wished I could break free from repeated cycles of self-doubt but I have been learning that I could transform my fears into faith, which has been grounding me.

The truth is, even the most experienced and successful people have phases of self-doubt in their day-to-day lives. Acknowledging and understanding the triggers of your fears can help you break through from feeling unmotivated to work on your goals. Let us find out what are the most common causes of self-doubt and how to beat them.

1. Comparison! Comparison! Comparison!

This is the worst enemy ever! How many times have you ever desired to be like someone else who is doing great in life? Erm, a couple of times, right? I understand that it is not peculiar for us to compare ourselves with others based on the fact we live in such a competitive world, but often, a majority of us don’t know what it takes to become that successful person. It is so easy to lose yourself by looking at what someone else has and what you lack. The best way to avoid comparison is by practicing gratitude and contentment. Make a list of things you are grateful for; this will naturally shift your thinking to a positive mindset. Then make a list of things you desire to have /become, then come up with a realistic strategic plan on how to achieve them.

2. Fear of failure due to past experience.

It is very normal to make mistakes. Most successful people I have met and know of are who they are because of their past failures. Mistakes can be magical lenses for you to view things differently. If growth is what you desire, you have to take chances in life to get out of your comfort zone. Let no one lie to you, mistakes will be part and parcel of your growth, but sometimes this can be avoided if you learn from someone’s failures. Oprah Winfrey, an author, and American talk show host once said, “We can’t become what we need to be by remaining what we are.” Yes! Take the chances and watch yourself grow!

3. Childhood traumas

Growing up, I was not quite a performer in school, especially in high school. I went through a school system that required satisfactory grades. Some teachers were not so patient with understanding my weaknesses, which affected me psychologically. The number of times I remained in school as a dismal performer, is quite a number! Things completely changed after getting to university, I got a couple of honor roll certificates and I did quite well.  Thing is, I still question my ability to perform up to date (it is getting quite better) even after the narrative changed. I don’t know your story, but I want you to know that you are quite brave! You are doing quite a good job of trying to heal and get better! What is holding you back from healing some of your childhood traumas if you are not? Growth can be quite uncomfortable sometimes because it forces you to stretch and change. It can be exhausting but very rewarding. “Inner child work is essential. It’s the essence of growth as a whole person.” -Cheryl Richardson. Remember, it is okay to seek help!

4. Overthinking.

You have finally gotten some time to spend alone reflecting on your day or yourself in general only to find yourself in your head having continuous thought patterns of pessimism self-talk. Often, when I overthink, my reasoning gets blurred and my stress level gets heightened. Does that sound familiar to you? These are some of the actions I have been implementing when I suffer from overthinking.

• Journaling. When I am bombarded with negative critical voices, I write them down. After writing them down, I try to figure out where the thoughts come from. For example, if, “I am not good enough for this opportunity” is what I have noted down, I will dig deeper within myself to try to understand what led me to have such a belief about myself.
• After analyzing where the negative thoughts come from, what I relish doing is self-reflection. This is such a great way to remind ourselves that we are capable of doing whatever we desire. Remind yourself of past events that you aced regardless of the circumstances you faced. The lessons you learned should make you get better at whatever it is you want to accomplish.
• Affirmations! I have been using the Bible to speak life over my situation. This week I have been reciting the book of Psalms 23 over my life. Your affirmations can come from different sources, and regardless of the source, speak life over our situation. This action comes with a sense of peace and braveness.
• Lastly, seek professional help. Verbalize your insecurities to a therapist. Sometimes, all you do need is someone to help you make sense of the bubble you leave in.

Latter thoughts! It is normal to doubt our capabilities sometimes, but doing nothing about your fears will hold you back from greatness. Self-doubt doesn’t have to enslave you. “Am I enough?” Yes, you are! Smile, you’ve got this!